ALL THE CREATURES WERE STIRRING (2018) Official review

The cool cover is not enough to prevent the delivery of coal in the filmmakers' stockings this year.

Yes it's that festive time of the year again. Pretty lights, jingle bells and holiday horror films. While Christmas horror hybrids are meager in the amount of titles even more disheartening is how few are really even worth a viewing. Newer offerings such as A CHRISTMAS HORROR STORY, KRAMPUS, and SILENT NIGHT hold their own as do foreign films such as SINT and RARE EXPORTS. Even mining ancient depths can unearth a few nuggets like CHRISTMAS EVIL, BLACK CHRISTMAS, and SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT. Unfortunately not unlike the sappy regular xmas genre, most of the recent offerings are paltry at best. Cookie cutters that skim or lazy pedestrian efforts that are uninspired other than being wrapped in a blood red Christmas ribbon. Where does ATCWS fit in? Well...

"Y'all don't touch these gifts, they might kill you!"

From the first laughable scene in an obvious set piece (Cmon, a movie theatre with three seats per row and one small center aisle?) to the opening "story"there is an obvious lack of budget. While I can forgive this as indie horror usually does rely on less greenbacks I simply cannot abide such a lackluster effort. Insipid, dull, uninspired and badly acted with the production quality of an Uncork'd film. The second story of a Christmas curse transferred is a fresh air reliever but near enough to save this one. Keep in mind this is an anthology film and in having multiple storys it's usually a spotty proceeding.

Omigod! I cannot believe I sat through the whole movie!

The entire cast are unknowns and obviously NOT real actors. This combined with the mediocre production makes for a very forgettable viewing experience. All in all I would say that if you really want to see it, by all means check it out. It IS watchable but...just barely! One can only hope my Christmas wish of no more crap titles pushed to raise a few bucks will become a reality some day.

2/5

88jrd